My Worst Nightmare

I’ve told you that I love having a lasting impression on people I will only meet once: Toll booth operators, TSA workers and the like.

I wasn’t completely honest. This does NOT apply to clerks in stores.

For some reason I want to remain completely anonymous when it comes to stores. Let’s say I go to the mall for the direct purpose of going to J-Crew and I walk up to the store and its empty? There’s a good chance I won’t go in. I don’t want the ladies in there asking if I need any help or if I am looking for anything specific. I just don’t want it.

This weekend I went to 7-11 and had a nightmare experience.

I was picking up 2 items. Baby powder and hand lotion. Both benign products, I know. I use baby powder kind of like the dad on My Big Fat Greek Wedding uses Windex.

Here’s what happened:

I placed the 2 items on the counter with a line forming behind me.

Clerk (picking up the baby powder to scan): You use this or is it for the kids?

Me (begrudgingly entering into a conversation about my purchases): Me.

Clerk: What you use it for?

Me: Everything.

Clerk: You use it for the face?

Me (not exactly sure what that even means): Yeah.

On to the second item, while the line behind me continues to grow.

Clerk: You like this lotion?

Me: Yeah, it’s great. (mind you, they only have 1 choice of lotion in 7-11, wasn’t much of a selection process).

Clerk: You use it for the hands?

Me: Yes.

Clerk: You use it for the face?

Me: No.

This interaction brought up a few thoughts and feelings. #1. NO ONE likes to have each of their selections discussed.

#2. She probably uses a lot of items for the face.

I felt like I was working with her:

http://www.funnyordie.com/embed_videos/d7734320d6/snl-clip-target-lady

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